It’s rained pretty much non-stop the past few days leaving me without much to do. It’s one thing when it rains or snows nonstop at home. I can still have people over or go to someone’s house or run down the stairs to a bar. Or even just sit home and spend the day watching movies or online. Here? I’m pretty much stuck in a hotel room. I tried to hit the hotel bar, but it just wasn’t cool because the rain was freezing and the workers were scarce. I ended up spending most of the day in the hotel room watching all three X-Men movies in English with Spanish subtitles. Which, if anything, taught me that in Spanish “esta bien” means a LOT of things. The good news? Wolverine is still awesome. Since I have nothing really exciting to write about I will just throw a few thoughts up that I’ve had over the past few days.

• I think the perfect length for a vacation is 5 days. 6 is you are flying out on that sixth day in the morning. Eight days was entirely too long for me to be gone. By day three you start to wonder what people are doing back home, but don’t really care because you’re in the pool. By day four you are doing something fun, but it’s starting to get old like “oh gee another adventure”. Then you start to think, you know what would really be cool? If someone from home was here to do this with me. By day 5 you start to actively miss home and by the sixth you just want to go home. I spent most of my day yesterday wondering who went to Fat Cats after work. Yeah. So, five is the ideal amount because you don’t want to leave yet but going home isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
• I’ve had the strangest dreams since I’ve been here. Maybe it’s because I’ve actually been dreaming since I haven’t been drunk enough NOT to dream. I had a dream that Oscar, my stepmom and I went to Brewers opening day only the Brewers were playing the Mariners who were wearing large suits like Fat Joe would wear. I wasn’t sure what this dream meant so I consulted a dream book and it means that I’m awesome. Phew.
• I finally found the one thing I hate more than douchebags in Red Sox hats, French douchebags in Red Sox hats. It’s almost like they took their douchery and turned it up to 11.
• Speaking of douche-y Sox, White Sox hat sales are up 25% since Obama was inaugurated. If you ever wonder why I think you should have to take a test when you register to vote, here it is. If change means more White Sox fans, we don’t need change! (This should have been McCain’s entire platform.)
• I probably shouldn’t tell people this, but I spent a solid 45 minutes working on my fantasy baseball team for next season before deciding that I should wait til I got home to go any further. My draft is two months away.
• Let’s talk about tipping. In Costa Rica (just like pretty much every country that is not America) you don’t have to tip. They add a 10% service charge to your bill and you can go above this if you like. It’s an interesting way to do things and in theory it makes for better service. No pushing to upsell and just more about getting you what you want. However, (and maybe it’s just the places I’ve been) there is a certain amount of failure in this approach. Mainly when it comes to drinking. NOT ONCE since I have been here has someone asked me if I would like a second drink. I’ve had to ask every single time. Yesterday when I went out to eat I decided I wanted a white russian after dinner, but I couldn’t track down my server in time to do it. (Here, you also pay a cashier instead of your server which I am 100% behind and think is the greatest thing ever.) As I write this I am at breakfast and it’s buffet style so I don’t even really need a server, but couldn’t they have someone walking around seeing if I want a bloody mary or a screwdriver? Here’s a hint: I do. I am on vacation. I don’t have to drive ever, I want to drink the majority of the day. Not get wasted, just ABD (always be drinking (I just made that up)). Is that too much to ask? If this is what it’s like in a world where you don’t have to tip, then take my service charge away.
• I miss my son, bad. Not that it’s likely that I would have seen him all this time, but I hate being this far away. What if something happened? I wouldn’t be able to get there. This kills me. I may never leave the state again.
• Yesterday, I woke up and there was a video facebook message on my wall. While watching it my parents asked me what I was watching and I told them. This turned into a conversation about social media in my generation. My stepmom said that “they can use that stuff against you in a court of law” which is laughable to say the least. I told her that I didn’t think it was against the law for girls to tell me that they love me, even if it does seem that way sometimes. My dad’s point was that he read my blog one time and I had a post about drinking making me gay and that maybe it wasn’t that good of an idea to have this stuff up there when I am in the midst of a custody battle for my son. He has a point, I guess, but I don’t see how that is going to keep me from my son. If we are going to use my blog as evidence of my quality as a father, then the good outweighs the bad.
• If I turn my cellphone on and I receive a text, it’s like another 10 bucks on my bill (international texting). If I turn it on and receive a phone call it’s like another 20. So, I haven’t turned it on. I’ve checked my voicemail a couple of times, but there hasn’t really been anything. What I’m REALLY wondering is what texts I have received. I had to remind most people I was leaving 3-4 times before it sunk in so I am thinking there is quite a few “out?” texts. I don’t know why I’m looking forward to this, but I am.
• You know if I owned a hotel in a resort location I would just have people walking around at all times with cold beer and blenders to make pina coladas. It’d be like a backpack full of tropical drink materials with secret compartments filled with pineapple and rum. That’s just me though.
• Here’s another reason not to travel to a foreign country: you can’t watch Hulu, Netflix online or any of the major networks video sites. Yesterday would have been nowhere near as frustrating if I could have caught up on How I Met Your Mother and The Office. I’m going to have to take an extra day off work to catch up on my DVR.
• I am not going to fully comment until I see The Wrestler, but screw the Oscars (after The Wrestler this should be upgraded to FUCK the Oscars). Where’s the love for Wall-E? Or even The Dark Knight? These are the movies people are going to remember in 50 years.

Alright, that’s it. I could go on like this all day, but I’m going to have a few screwdrivers and enjoy the last of pura vida. I fly home tomorrow and then go directly from the airport to Metallica at the Allstate Arena. Needless to say I will be drinking on the plane.