December 24, 2009 – 1:01 am
It’s getting kind of hard to believe things are going to get better.
I’ve been drowning too long to believe that the tide’s going to turn.
And I’ve been living too long to believe that things are going to get easier now.
I’m still trying to shake off the pain from the lessons I’ve learned.
- Dracula’s Lament
(I always wanted to start a post off with a quote, makes me seem interesting.)
My “journey” to twenty eight years old was not exactly what I had in mind, but it’s not exactly one that I wouldn’t choose again if I had the chance. There’s really nothing I like more in my life than being proven wrong. For instance on Miller Park Drunk I have come out strongly against their new center fielder, Carlos Gomez, and that is something that I would love to be proven wrong on. It’s not fun if I am right about them not being good because of this guy. Being right about things isn’t really all it’s cracked up to be and that sums up my entire 27 years of life in a nutshell. I have always thought I knew better than what people told me, I have always thought I was the smartest and I have always thought I had it all figured out, yet time and time again I have been proven wrong. You’d think that would suck, but I’m really happy about it. If you’ve been around me for five seconds you can probably tell that I think my entire life is a movie and the tagline I’d have to use would be something ridiculous like “sometimes you have to lose everything to find out what truly matters” or “sometimes everything you ever wanted turns out to be not what you wanted at all” or even, my personal favorite, “sometimes what you’ve spent your whole life looking for turns out to be right in front of your eyes”. (It’s pure Oscar bait and I love it.) read more »
Tags birthday, carlos gomez, center fielder, dad, dracula, friends, girlfriend, good year, job, life, little baby, miller park, nolan, relationship, screenplay
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November 22, 2009 – 12:40 am
I have been thinking about the notion of having goals lately. I have never been a person who plans that far ahead in life or sets goals with deadlines. In my experience every time I have tried, it hasn’t worked out as I planned it to. This isn’t to say that I don’t have goals, just that they don’t really mean anything. Here’s a few goals that I have.
- Own a BMW: BMW’s are awesome, one of the finest cars you can possibly drive. I’d like to drive one.
- Buy a house.
- Take all my friends to Disney World: I have this memory of my whole family (my parents, my cousins and their parents) and a few of my parent’s friends all going down to Disney World when I was a kid and I just think it would be awesome to recreate that experience with my friends because, well, we are a lot more fun. Also, Disney World is awesome.
- Be a guest on the Adam Carolla Podcast: I think I’m a funny guy, but if this ever happened I would have undeniable proof.
- Sell a screenplay: This has been a goal of mine since I was 17 years old and it will remain a goal of mine until the day it is accomplished, no matter what.
Looking at that list these are all decent goals, right? Maybe a little farfetched, but definitely some things to strive for. The thing is if I were to accomplish #5, the rest would be pretty damn easy to accomplish because they are all tied into money and success. Without money, I am not going to get to drive a BMW and that’s just the way it is. Does that make these bad goals? Does that make me a failure if I never accomplish any of them? I don’t think so, but if I did accomplish them all it’d be pretty fucking awesome wouldn’t it? In the end that’s why I set them and set them so high because if I don’t accomplish them I can live with that and still be happy, but if I do accomplish them it will be the coolest thing ever and we’ll all go to Disney World.
Tags 17 years, accomplishment, adam carolla, awesome, bmw, bmw bmw, cousins, disney, disney world, failure, finest cars, friends, funny guy, life, memory, money, notion, parents, podcasts, screenplay, undeniable proof, work
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October 6, 2009 – 2:42 pm
In the past few months I have become INCREDIBLY anti-relationship. I think there are a lot of reasons for this. For one almost every one of my friends that is in a relationship is not around as much as they used to be. This is sort of a necessary evil to the relationship process. I understand it and I can appreciate it, but I don’t have to like it. What really bothers me though is the way that they change the way that they are after getting into a relationship. You like football? Get a girlfriend and all the sudden you prefer spending your Sundays at Michaels. Your favorite movie is 300? Get a girlfriend and your favorite movie suddenly stars Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson or, in other words, it sucks. You are probably reading this and thinking I am a moron for saying these things, but there is no way in hell my buddy watches Jon and Kate Plus 8 without a girlfriend. Carpenters don’t watch that sort of thing unless there is a girl making them watch that. It’s just a fact of life. So, yeah, not the biggest fan of the whole girlfriend experience.
Now, this isn’t to say that everyone in the world has a bad relationship or that I don’t think a good relationship exists. It’s just that they are very few and far between. I think that for it to work someone would need to inherently “get” me. For it to work in my situation we’d definitely have to be friends and you definitely wouldn’t judge me. To date, I don’t believe that this has ever actually happened. Well, except for that one time that it did. read more »
Tags accomplishment, buddies, carpenters, cellphone, dating, dawson joey, exceptions, fact of life, friends, girlfriend, girlfriend experience, girls, good relationship, hell, job, jobs, jon and kate plus 8, kate hudson, life, matthew mcconaughey, michaels, moron, necessary evil, relationship, relationships, screenplay, television show, watches, work
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September 30, 2009 – 12:26 pm
I realized that I wrote a lot about moving to Hawaii yesterday, but not actually about what it was like in Hawaii. Here’s the thing about Hawaii if you take away the beaches, the sun, the weather and everything else you are in an overpriced Alabama. Hawaiian people are stupid. Here’s how you know the Hawaiian people are stupid, they eat Spam. Spam is available everywhere in Hawaii. McDonalds has Spam McMuffins, Burger King has a Spam Whopper and Taco Bell has a Spam Chimichanga. Everywhere you go it’s Spam and anyone who has ever ate Spam knows that it’s fucking terrible. Honestly, I think if you met the CEO of Spam and asked him how he got his money he would do one of two things A) he would apologize or B) he would lie about it. There is no way anyone on the board of directors of Spam actually uses their product, they are most likely ashamed to be on the board of directors at Spam which proves that it’s a shitty product.
Whenever someone asks me if I surfed when I lived in Hawaii I tell them no and when they ask me why I tell them because Hawaiian people will kill you. read more »
Tags Alabama, America, beaches, bud light, burger king, electricity, exceptions, fish, halle berry, haolie, hawaii, hawaiians, hotels, kkk, life, maui, mcdonalds, money, moving to hawaii, music, pidgin, spam, stupid idea, taco bell, weather, Wisconsin, work
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September 29, 2009 – 1:41 pm
I found this book that I haven’t read in a long time and I was leafing through the pages and I found the one way plane ticket to Hawaii that I bought way back when. Looking back it’s been three years since that flight and it’s crazy how much has changed. In some ways I don’t even feel like I’m the same person, in other ways I feel like I am finally doing what I was trying to do way back then.
When I moved back to Wisconsin in 2005, the plan was to stay at my dad’s for awhile and make some money. Once I saved up some money I was going to move to either Seattle or LA. The idea being that I was going to start my screenwriting career. I thought Wisconsin would be a great place to go because the winters fucking suck and I could just sit home in the cold all the time and just do some writing. This, of course, never happened. You start hanging out with some dudes and you just end up drinking way too much like always. I think that I’ve always had some really good ideas and if I ever sat down and wrote them that I could be a screenwriter, but I am a master procrastinator and if I get the chance to go and get drunk instead I usually take it. Anyways, time goes by and I don’t write a thing. I don’t save a thing and I really have no idea what I am doing.
Then I meet this girl. read more »
Tags Alabama, Books, chick, chicks, craziness, dad, dating, drinking, dudes, girlfriend, girls, hawaii, innocence, job, jobs, life, long time, master procrastinator, maui, mets, money, plane ticket, relationship, relationships, screenwriter, screenwriters, screenwriting career, seattle, sweet tea, teeth, tickets, Wisconsin, work
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